Sad Valentine

I can't remember having a Valentine as sad as today.
The boys left two Valentine cards on my bedside before leaving for school. I did kiss them and say Happy Valentine and "I love you" before going back to sleep.
Jeroen also kissed me on his way to work.
When I woke up I read the saddest Valentine cards, I can't tell you what they wrote, but basically they think we love the small one we're adopting more than them.
My heart just broke into pieces.



Luckily Jeroen came home for lunch. I had an idea to buy Valentines for the boys. I borrowed his car.
But first I needed my own shop therapy. I dropped by Muji, Bonifacio High Street and saw a security guard watching the sidewalk where a motorcycle driver had snatched a woman's Louis Vuitton bag between High Street and Serendra last week.
Lately there've been lots of incidents involving motorcycle drivers and designer bags.
I wonder though if these people know how to spot a fake?



Muji was really quiet this Monday afternoon. I was happy to see my favorite clothes hampers were back in stock.
Next, I walked over to Patchi to buy Valentines for the boys and myself. Speaking of Marie France, Dawn Zulueta entered the store on my way out. This place is always star-studded. I bumped into Ruffa and her daughter there last time.
I hauled my ass off to Megamall to buy balloon arrangements for the boys.
I bought three arrangements: two big ones for Ben and Markus and a small one for the baby. I wanted to send a signal to the bigger boys that they were loved in a bigger way.

Last Sunday I took Ben and Markus to get haircuts, DVDs, Brother's Burgers and two wrestlers from the toy store.
How quickly they forget the things I do. Not a day passes that I don't show my love for them.



Jeroen and I arranged the gifts in the boys' room before he went back to work.
When the boys came home, all sweaty and smelly from school they stopped by my room. I told them to check out the Valentines in their room.
They came back to thank me, then I told them I cried earlier because of their cards.
I didn't get mad, I showed Ben pictures on my Flickr, showing him memories of me and him together.
How can he not know how much I love him?



I'm still sad. Jeroen and I decided maybe it's time to send the little boy to playschool to be with other children his age.
Adoption is not an easy thing but I believe love is an action word. I try to remind myself this ain't no biggie. It has to work out.
I don't know what's gonna happen but I'm hoping love will prevail.
So help me God.